“A miscarriage is every hope and dream you had for your child being crushed in 6 words.”

“A miscarriage is every hope and dream you had for your child being crushed in 6 words.”

“Nothing will ever prepare you for the pain or emptiness of losing a child. A miscarriage is every hope and dream you had for your child being crushed in 6 words. It’s crying and cursing in the doctor office. It’s leaving your doctors office knowing that your little baby that you tried so hard to conceive is inside you and is no longer alive. Knowing your body failed you. Begging God to bring the life back into your child. Begging him to take you instead. It’s him failing you. Its going to a close family member for support and hearing “It was probably retarded” a mere hour after hearing the news, hearing “it’s not that big of a deal” while your child is still inside of your womb. It’s three days later finally holding your tiny baby boy that you hoped and prayed for, lifeless in your hands. Its going to the emergency room because your bleeding out and going through hell, alone as your husband holds your daughter tight in the waiting room because you didn’t want her to potentially watch you die. Its going home to take one last look at your baby’s precious lips that look just like his daddy’s before you burry him. It’s you feeling like everything is all your fault. Watching your husband cry and shake in a way you have never seen before, not even when his father died. Feeling like your husband deserves a woman with a body that wouldn’t put him through this pain. It’s crying at three a.m because your arms are empty. It’s losing it on your baby’s due date. Its realizing you won’t ever kiss his owies or wipe his tears. You will never sing and dance with him in the kitchen. You won’t see him marry the love of his life. It’s getting pregnant again and being filled with guilt and worry. It’s constantly thinking of your child and wishing you could hold him and love on him. It’s knowing that he’s safe where he’s at and he’s well taken care of even if your not able to be the one taking care of him. It’s praying to God to hold him tight for you. It’s still telling him you love him. Its okay to weep. It’s okay to loose it. I lost my child. Mommy and Daddy love you Malachi Eriksen.”

“I may be empty-handed, but my heart has never been so full.”

“I may be empty-handed, but my heart has never been so full.”

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